


the fear that you’re up against

by DawnieWrites



Series: L&M AU [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: A/B/O, Abortion, Adam is not nice (in this fic), Alpha Adam, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Doctors, Dubious Consent, Emotional Manipulation, Extremely Dubious Consent, Guilt, M/M, Manipulation, Omega Keith (Voltron), Photography Kink, Pregnancy, Pregnant Keith (Voltron), Pregnant Sex, Rough Sex, Sexual Violence, Teacher-Student Relationship, Teen Pregnancy, Underage Sex, Unplanned Pregnancy, but NO doctor or medical play, discussion about abortion, fic of a fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-22
Updated: 2019-03-26
Packaged: 2019-11-26 10:05:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18179198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DawnieWrites/pseuds/DawnieWrites
Summary: He spends one more night in his dad’s old house. It’s comforting, somehow, to wrap himself in the old memories. As if thinking about them could bring them back, could turn back time and make it so that his dad had never gone on that call. He knows it’s impossible. And even if it weren’t, he’s not sure if he’d want to; because if his dad had never died, who's to say Keith ever would have met Shiro.It’s exhausting to think about all of the possibilities and ‘what-ifs’. He needs to focus on what’s actually happening, needs to be able to do what needs to be done. Adam keeps telling him that this - him and Keith - has to stay secret. That no one would understand; they would kick Keith out of the Garrison and, worst of all, it would probably hurt Shiro. To protect Adam - to protect himself and to protectShiro- Keith knows what he has to do. He sets his shoulders, huddled beneath five blankets on the faded couch, worn in in all the right places, and falls asleep with his arms wrapped around his stomach.He knows what he has to do.----ABO 'verse AU of theodora_honey's L&M AU; based on their curiouscat convos.Proceed with caution





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [theodora_honey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theodora_honey/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Lamb and Martyr](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15713163) by [theodora_honey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theodora_honey/pseuds/theodora_honey). 



> I've read this through maybe 3-4 times as I was writing and since it finished and my last two read-throughs I had myself crying.
> 
> SO
> 
> Please please, pleasepleasePLEASE **read the tags and heed them** , okay?  
> They are there for a reason. If there's any tagged content that you worry may upset or trigger you, I urge you to skip this reading and I promise that it won't offend or upset me.
> 
> This is not the happiest of fics. It's a dark fic based on a dark AU and covering sensitive topics that I hope I was able to handle as well as possible.
> 
> For those of you who choose to keep reading, if there's anything you think I should have tagged that I didn't, please don't hesitate to make suggestions, but any and all concrit should be left to my DM's on [ twitter ](https://twitter.com/DawnieWrites) or [ tumblr](https://dwtlcwriting.tumblr.com/) if you feel you must leave it at all, please and thank you.

The gel is cold when it touches Keith’s skin. He sucks in a sharp breath and receives a quiet apology as it’s smeared across his stomach. He squeezes his eyes shut.

“There we go,” the doctor says finally. Pressing the wand a little more firmly against his stomach and pressing some buttons on the machine. A moment later, a soft, steady, warbling beat fills the quiet room. “That’s the heartbeat.”

“How...how far?” His voice cracks.

“Hmm...I’d say about thirteen weeks. We can try and tell the primary gender, if you’d like,” the doctor offers. Keith shakes his head, eyes still squeezed shut.  
  
“I can’t keep it.”  
  
“Well, adoption is always an option,” the doctor remarks carefully, taking away the wand and wiping his stomach clean. Keith shakes his head again, opening his eyes.  
  
“I can’t _have_ it,” he rasps, turning his head to the doctor standing at the ultrasound machine. She finishes putting everything away and turns to face him, face serious.  
  
“Do you mean that?” She asks him after a long moment. Keith nods as he pushes himself up into a proper sitting position. “Is there any part of you that wants this baby?”  
  
“Maybe,” he has to stop and clear his throat, “maybe if it were any other time...or anyone or anywhere else but...no. I don’t. I _can’t_.” He wipes angrily at his eyes. “They’ll kick me out of school.”  
  
“The high school won’t expel you for being pregnant. Legally, they can’t.”  
  
“Not in high school,” Keith corrects her. “I’m at the Garrison.”  
  
“A cadet.”  
  
Keith nods.  
  
“We don’t provide the service you’re asking for here, but there’s another clinic I can refer you to,” the doctor says, “but if you’re sure about this, I’d have to get you an appointment today.”  
  
“Today?”  
  
“Law requires a two-week waiting period after all consultations before the doctor can actually administer the termination. And the legal cutoff in most states around here is still sixteen weeks.”  
  
“Sixteen weeks?” He chokes out.  
  
“Just be glad New Mexico doesn’t require the Alpha’s consent anymore,” she remarks bitterly. “Texas does, which is why I’m sending you to _this_ clinic instead of a more local one,” she explains, writing down an address on a sticky note. “I’m also legally required to give you this,” she holds out a small square of what looks like card-stock. Keith takes it and flips it over to find a printed photo of his ultrasound. “What you do with it now is up to you.”  
  
Keith’s hand starts trembling. That...that’s his baby.  
  
“Do you still want me to call the clinic?”  
  
He follows the outline of the baby’s face with one finger, tracing the jut of its nose. That’s growing inside of him. A brand new life. Made from him.  
  
_And Adam_ , his brain reminds him. He squeezes his eyes shut, clutching the photo in one hand.  
  
“Keith?”  
  
He opens his eyes, determined.  
  
“Call the clinic,” he answers, voice far steadier than he feels, “I want the abortion.”

 

-*-

 

Keith figures out that he’s pregnant on a Tuesday, one week after his seventeenth birthday. He’s been nauseous and tired; hungry all the time while also completely disinterested in any of the food they’ve been serving in the commissary. At first, he attributes it to the fact that Shiro is gone - the _Persephone_ left Earth’s atmosphere months ago, taking his only real support system with it. And with Shiro’s departure, Adam’s near-nightly visits have become less frequent and less...desperate. Almost tender.  
  
He calls Keith good and strong and beautiful. On Keith’s birthday, he set Keith astride him backwards and set an almost gentle pace, twined fingers in his hair and told him how good he looked, how much he loved it...loved _Keith_. The praise pleases Keith and makes him sick to his stomach. So when the nausea and exhaustion start to pervade his every day, he thinks nothing of it. Tells himself it’s the guilt and the loneliness and the stress of exams.  
  
Then he throws up every morning for a week straight and remembers a couple of months ago, when he cycled off his suppressants because he forgot to make an appointment to update his shot. Adam had shown up one night in the middle of his heat, when he was at his most desperate and needy. Keith remembers the scratches and indentations he had left on Adam’s back, the bruises on his own thighs and hips and arms, the way Adam had held him and fucked him and knotted and _bred_ him ( _you’d look so good, fat with my pups_ ) and promptly throws up again.  
  
He steals a pregnancy test from the medbay when he goes to ask the doctor on duty for something to help with the nausea so he can try and eat. Now he’s here, sitting in a bathroom stall just a few feet down the hall from the commissary where everyone is eating dinner - where _Adam_ is eating dinner. He stares at the little pink plus sign on the white plastic stick and tells himself it must be wrong.  
  
‘ _It’s just one test_ ,’ he thinks desperately, _false positives happen all the time._ ’ his hands are white-knuckled around the test and he’s breathing harshly through his nose, trying not to panic. He can’t go to the medbay. Rumors spread faster than anything else, even on a campus and base as big as the Garrison, and if there’s one thing that he’s sure of, it’s that he can’t tell Adam. He doesn’t know for sure how the older man will react, but he’s sure it won’t be good. And if any of the higher-ups - like Iverson - found out, he’d be expelled for sure. He’s a minor, a ward of the Garrison, but worse than all that he’s an _Omega_. A military base is no place for an Omega. It’s something he’d heard over and over, both before Shiro took a chance and got him into the academy and since. And while he’s not the only Omega student, and there’s a small handful of Omegas on the staff and faculty, a military base is especially no place for a _pregnant_ Omega.  
  
He inhales sharply, forcing himself to relax. Once he’s a little calmer, he wraps the test in half a roll of toilet paper, steps out of the stall, and buries the test at the bottom of the trash can. He washes his hands, splashes some water on his face, and walks back to his room, a semblance of a plan forming as he locks himself in and hopes that he’ll get to spend the night alone.

 

-*-

  
Shiro left him the keys to his hover bike, partly to make sure it stays in good condition and partly in case of emergencies. Keith is declaring this an emergency. He gets a weekend pass and takes advantage of Adam’s Friday evening class to leave campus as soon as it’s allowed. He heads out into the Arizona desert, past the edges of Garrison property. He follows the trail that he and Shiro carved out over many rides and races, departing from the path after maybe half an hour and veering in the direction of the small house he hasn’t seen in years.  
  
He takes the steps up onto the porch slowly, not quite sure what he’s afraid of, and takes a deep breath before unlocking the door with the key he’d kept hidden in a roll of socks. The door creaks open and Keith winces as he steps inside. Nothing’s changed. The couch by the window and the stained coffee table; the bookshelves and the broken radio array; the photographs, now covered in dust. Keith drops his small overnight bag and kicks the door shut.  
  
He finds a (mostly) clean wash rag in the bathroom and starts dusting every surface he can find. He takes the couch cushions outside and beats them with a broken broom, releasing clouds of dust and dirt until he’s satisfied. He pulls the blankets out of the hall closet and off of the beds and hangs a new clothesline in the back to air them out. He opens all of the windows and draws a bucket of hot, soapy water.  
  
He doesn’t realize he’s nesting until he’s on hands and knees scrubbing at the faded linoleum in the kitchen. He sits back on his heels and bites his lip, willing away the tears he can feel gathering in his eyes. He drops the washcloth in the bucket of soapy water, eases up onto his feet, and snags a blanket from the clothesline. He can’t bring himself to sleep in his old bed, or in his dad’s, so he curls up on the couch instead.  
  
It takes far too long for him to fall asleep, and morning comes far too quickly. He feels more exhausted than he has in weeks, and he can feel the headache building behind his eyes. He swallows down his exhaustion along with an apple and a bottle of water he snuck out of the commissary the day before. Once he’s marginally sure he’s not going to puke it back up, he gathers the blankets from outside, folds them all and sets them on the coffee table, and then locks up the house to set out for the day. It’s already a long trip to El Paso, but he keeps having to stop and take breaks to pee and calm his nerves. What was supposed to be maybe a five and a half hour trip takes him six hours instead, and he gets to the clinic twenty minutes after they’ve already opened for the day instead of getting there before they’d opened like he’d hoped to do.  
  
He walks into the clinic in Texas still holding onto some faint hope that the home test was wrong, that he’s not actually pregnant, and walks out with what feels like the weight of the world resting in the pit of his stomach and the address of a different clinic clutched in his hand.

 

-*-

 

The doctor at the clinic in Las Cruces takes another ultrasound, confirms what the doctor in El Paso had told him, and then counsels him on his options.  
  
“I know Trish said you told her you wanted the procedure, but legally I have to talk to you about all available options,” he sighs as Keith signs the form confirming that he’s been provided with all the viable choices and that he understands what he’s agreeing to. “We’ll set an appointment for Saturday, two weeks from today. You’re not local, correct?”  
  
Keith shakes his head.  
  
“Do you have somewhere in the area that you can stay? We’ll prep you on Saturday, but we won’t be able to actually perform the procedure until Sunday.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
“Fifteen weeks requires what’s called a surgical abortion. We’ll have to medically dilate you, which can take some time. Then on Sunday, we’ll give you some anesthetic and remove the fetus.”  
  
“I...I don’t have anywhere to stay,” Keith admits, a little panicky.  
  
“I’ll get you the name of a local Omega shelter. The woman who runs it often helps us out. We get quite a few...out-of-state Omegas here.”  
  
Keith nods, hearing what he doesn’t say: they get Omegas who want procedures without their Alpha’s consent.  
  
“The nurse will bring in the consent forms and confirm all the details. Someone will give you a call a day or so before to -”  
  
“No!” Keith blurts. “No one can call me. Just...I’ll be here.”  
  
The doctor eyes him for a moment and the he nods.  
  
“Okay. Let the nurse know,” he sets the clipboard down near the sink and turns to the door. “And Keith?”  
  
Keith looks up at him.  
  
“It’s alright if you change your mind.”  
  
Keith clenches his fists as the door shuts behind the doctor.

 

-*-

 

He spends one more night in his dad’s old house. It’s comforting, somehow, to wrap himself in the old memories. As if thinking about them could bring them back, could turn back time and make it so that his dad had never gone on that call. He knows it’s impossible. And even if it weren’t, he’s not sure if he’d want to; because if his dad had never died, who's to say Keith ever would have met Shiro.  
  
It’s exhausting to think about all of the possibilities and ‘what-ifs’. He needs to focus on what’s actually happening, needs to be able to do what needs to be done. Adam keeps telling him that this - him and Keith - has to stay secret. That no one would understand; they would kick Keith out of the Garrison and, worst of all, it would probably hurt Shiro. Keeping the secret means not keeping the baby. To protect Adam - to protect himself and to protect _Shiro_ \- Keith knows what he has to do. He sets his shoulders, huddled beneath five blankets on the faded couch, worn in in all the right places, and falls asleep with his arms wrapped around his stomach.  
  
He knows what he has to do.

 

-*-

 

Adam is sitting on his bed when Keith returns to his room Sunday afternoon. Keith drops his bag as the door hisses shut and locks behind him. Adam doesn’t look up from his data pad.

“You left class in quite a rush Friday afternoon,” he remarks conversationally. “Imagine my surprise when I learned you’d gone off campus for the entire weekend.”

Keith says nothing.

“Go anywhere...interesting?”

“You have access to the pass logs, don’t you?” Keith finally replies, leaning against the wall to untie his boots and tug them off.

“Indeed I do,” Adam confirms. He finally lowers the data pad, but he still doesn’t look at Keith. “Camping doesn’t really seem like something you’d do, Keith.” He rolls his head to look at Keith, almost lazy in the movement. “At least, not by yourself.”

“Who, exactly, do you think I’d be meeting?” Keith remarks almost bitterly. “I’ve got no one, remember?”

“That’s not true, baby,” Adam croons, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and reaching out to tug Keith in by his belt. “You’ve got your Alpha, don’t you?” His tone is calm, but Keith can hear the threat beneath it. He attempts a smile, resting his hands on Adam’s forearms.

“Yea,” he replies, “Yea, I do.”

“And you’d never keep secrets from your Alpha, would you baby?” Adam’s voice is almost fond, but it also sounds like he’s teasing Keith - probably because he is. Because at this point he knows Keith’s scent better than even _Shiro_ probably did and Keith has always been something of a shit liar.

“No, Alpha,” Keith replies softly. “Good Omegas don’t lie to their Alphas.” He bares his neck, dropping his eyes, hating himself for it even as it has the intended effect of distracting Adam, reminding him why he’s _really_ here waiting in Keith’s bedroom.

Adam’s smile grows wide and he leans in. Like this, sitting on the bed, he’s at the perfect height to reach Keith’s neck without bending down at all. Keith’s eyes flutter closed as Adam buries his nose in his glands, scenting him. Keith’s hands travel up from Adam’s arms to his head, fingers carding through his hair as teeth scrape over the junction of his neck, a silent promise ( _threatthreatthreat_ his animal brain screams; he swallows it down and ignores it). Adam bites down, sucking on his neck with more pressure than he really needs in order to leave the hickeys that he loves seeing on Keith. Keith can’t help the way his mouth drops open in a gasp at the mixture of pain and pleasure that the feeling brings.

He gasps again when Adam tangles one hand in his hair and forces him to his knees. Keith works Adam’s belt and pants open with fumbling fingers and prays to any God that may be listening to help him keep this secret just a little longer...just until he doesn’t have to anymore.

 

-*-

 

Keith almost makes it. 

It’s difficult, convincing Adam that he’s not hiding anything. The nausea hasn’t gone away - if anything it seems to have gotten _worse_ somehow, and he finds himself puking after at least one meal a day, sometimes two, and Adam comments. Keith manages to convince him it’s just a stomach flu - it is that time of year, after all - and Adam sniffs and tells him to stop acting like a baby about it before taking him to bed.

Adam doesn’t usually stay overnight during the week, and if he’s done so, he’s always gone before the duty officer starts making morning rounds. So, Keith wakes up early Wednesday morning to an empty bed; at first he doesn’t realize why he’s apparently upset by waking up alone. Then he registers the coil of tension in his stomach, his cock at half-mast, and the slick starting to pool between his legs. He pinches his lips together and rolls onto his side, hands travelling south. He slicks up two fingers, sliding them easily past his entrance as his other hand wraps around his cock. His orgasm doesn’t take long to arrive, but it only serves to leave him breathless and somehow aching for something more. He spends the rest of the day aching and miserable and snappish.

At the end of that first week, he’s more exhausted than he’s ever been. His back hurts and his chest has been getting sore, and there’s nothing he can do about it. His abs have been holding up so far (thank God for mandatory Garrison PT), but he knows that soon enough, they’ll give way to the soft curve of a baby bump. That frightens him. He hopes against hope that he doesn’t start to show before his appointment, because he doesn’t think his uniform would be able to hide it.

Friday afternoon rolls around and he find himself frustrated and angry at himself for it. He’s woken up in the middle of the night the past two nights alone and horny beyond relief; some of what he’d read about pregnancy hormones appears to have been the truth. He’s not in heat - can’t be - so he doesn’t consider himself desperate enough to seek Adam out, but the moment he steps foot into the calculus classroom and catches sight of the older man, all Keith’s brain appears to be able to concentrate on is Adam’s smell.

Halfway through class, when Adam is walking around checking problem sets and correcting mistakes, he stops at Keith’s station. It’s no different from usual: he rests a hand at Keith’s shoulder, thumb sliding subtly across his nape as he leans in close under the guise of checking his assignment. It sets Keith on fire. He squeezes his thighs together against the slick he can feel dripping into his underwear, taking a long, deep breath in an attempt to calm his stirring cock.

Adam squeezes his shoulder and, when Keith turns his head, raises an eyebrow. Keith’s mouth runs dry. He flushes, feeling his cheeks burning, and lowers his head back to his work as Adam moves on to the next student.

By the time class ends Keith has managed to avoid an awkward boner, but he can still feel the slick gathering in his briefs, is sure everyone else can smell it. He stands slowly as the other cadets gather their belongings and file out of the room. He trails behind and finds himself pausing a few steps away from the door as it slides shut behind the last cadet.

“Did you need something, Keith?” Adam asks from behind him.

Keith clenches his jaw, curls his fists and sets his shoulders, leaving the classroom. He can practically feel Adam smirking as the door shuts behind him. He forces down half a sandwich in the commissary and then sequesters himself in his room, settling in at his desk with some homework and waiting for the inevitable visit.

It doesn’t come.

Keith can’t concentrate. There’s a heat pooling in his stomach, wetness still gathering between his legs. He presses his thighs together, slipping a hand into his pants, over his briefs, rubbing at his cock. It doesn’t help. He whines, dropping his stylus. He ignores it as it rolls across the desk in favor of slipping his other hand down the back of his briefs and rubbing it through the slick. It’s not enough. He thinks back to Adam’s scent and lets out another involuntary whine. He’s never felt like this, not even during a heat; he’s horny and desperate and it’s _not enough_. He presses hard against his cock one last time before giving up. He withdraws his hands and stands.

Curfew has long-since passed, but there’s still half an hour until lights out and it’s Friday evening. The duty officers are always less attentive over the weekends, so it’s easy enough for him to slip from his room and make his way in the direction of the officer’s quarters, careful and quiet. By the time he reaches the door he wants, his briefs are practically soaked. He knocks, three quick raps on the door, and a part of him hopes that no-one answers, but less than a minute passes before the door is sliding open to reveal Adam behind it, giving him an almost-expectant look.

“It’s past curfew,” he remarks idly. Keith grinds his teeth and surges forward, wrapping his fingers in the front of Adam’s open uniform jacket and pulling him down for a greedy kiss. Adam laughs, the sound more dark than joyful, and pulls Keith back into the living room with him. Keith presses on, using the small advantage that Adam has let him keep to push the older man back until he’s sinking down onto the couch. Keith crawls into his lap, grinding against him as he breaks away from the kiss.

“Something I can do for you?” Adam asks, a rephrase of his question from earlier. Keith’s shaking, both out of a need to be touched and out of anger that Adam is going to make him ask for it. He tries to ignore the question, leaning forwards to attempt to draw Adam into another kiss, but Adam brings up a hand, curving it around his throat just beneath his jaw, holding him in place.

“I asked you a question, Keith, and I expect an answer.”

Keith swallows tightly. He’s throbbing with need and he can feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes as he works up the strength to swallow what very little pride he has left.

“Adam,” the name escapes his lips as more whine than actual word and Adam’s eyes darken. He leans in to lick a stripe up Keith’s neck. “Adam, _please_.”

“Tell me what you want,” Adam whispers harshly, even as his free hand starts working at buckles and zippers between them. Adam works quickly, tugging Keith’s briefs down over the curve of his ass.

“I...I want _you_ ,” Keith pants, the last word turning into another whine as Adam drags dangerous fingers through the slick dripping from his entrance. “Want you _in me._ ”

Adam practically growls, tugging his own cock out through the front of his boxers and swiping his slick-covered hand over the length of it a few times before he helps Keith sit up and sink down onto it. Keith keens at the feeling, at the stretch and burn of finally, _finally,_ being filled the way his body’s been craving. Adam groans and lets his head fall back against the back of the couch.

“ _Fuck_ , baby,” he pants. Keith doesn’t stay still for long; he takes a few breaths and then he’s moving, planting his knees firmly on the couch and his hands on Adam’s shoulders for balance as he rides Adam’s cock with an enthusiasm he’s never shown before. Adam lifts his head to watch. “ _Fuck,_ ” he breathes again, hand scrambling next to him for his comm, tossed to the side when he’d gone to answer the door. He taps the screen without even looking and within the next few seconds he’s recording as Keith works himself on his cock. His head falls back and he shifts the angle until Adam’s cock is brushing his prostate with each thrust. “What a good little Omega,” Adam growls, “such a good slut for me.”

Keith whimpers, dropping a hand to his cock. Adam squeezes his throat, just enough to remind him that his hand is there, thrusting his hips up sharply and making Keith gasp.

“What do you want, slut?”

Keith doesn’t answer, can't, focused on his pleasure as he is. Adam removes the hand from his throat just long enough to smack him in the face once, not hard enough to bruise, but definitely hard enough to get his attention.

“I...I want to come,” he pants, “please, please Adam, please  _Alpha_ , pleasepleaseplease.”

“Then come,” Adam growls, squeezing a little tighter, thrusting up as Keith slams down, aiming for just the right spot. Keith sees stars, going stock-still as his orgasm wrings through him, making him shake and tremble and keen loud enough that Adam presses his hand to his mouth to stifle it.

When Keith comes back to himself, he’s leaning against Adam’s chest, face buried in his neck as fingers comb through his hair. Adam’s chest is rumbling as he speaks and Keith’s ears burn at his words.

“- such a pretty little Omega cockslut,” he croons. “But you didn’t think you could just take whatever you wanted, did you?” Keith squeezes around Adam’s cock, still hard inside of him. Adam chuckles, a hand coming up to remove his glasses and set them on the couch cushion beside him. “A good Omega doesn’t just satisfy themselves, you know that don’t you?” Keith nods shakily into Adam’s neck. “You have to satisfy your Alpha, too. You want to satisfy me, don’t you, Keith? You want to be a good Omega?” Keith nods again and swears he can practically hear the way Adam smiles as he surges forward, picking Keith up and practically slamming his back down onto the coffee table behind him as he takes what he wants. All Keith can manage to do is dig his fingers into Adam’s biceps and moan at every thrust. He’s essentially bent in half, legs trapped together by his pants and briefs, and he has the dim realization that he still has his boots on. Adam’s thrusts become more forceful, shoving the table back an inch or two, until he buries himself to the hilt and finds his own release.

A few minutes pass before Adam draws back, pulling out of Keith. He whines at the sensation and tries to lower his legs, but Adam holds him in place, reaching for his comm again. Once he’s taken his fill of pictures, he drops Keith’s legs. They’re both still fully-clothed, with the exception of Adam’s shoes and socks. Somehow that makes it seem worse.

Adam smirks, leans down and caresses Keith’s cheek tenderly with one hand before pressing their lips together, the act a chaste comparison to the one they’ve just finished. He stands up straight.

“Clean yourself up, then get undressed and come to bed,” he remarks calmly before he walks away, spent cock still hanging out of his pants. Keith shudders and lets out a shaky breath. Shame floods him; he can blame the hormones all he wants but at then end of it all, _he_  started this. This time, he sought Adam out and he _enjoyed_ it. The thought brings fresh tears to his eyes, but he blinks them back. After a long moment, he takes a deep breath and shakily sits up to remove his boots and follow Adam’s instructions. Despite however else he feels, it would be nice not to be alone.

He wakes up in the middle of the night practically humping Adam’s leg, and Adam slides down his body, pinching Keith’s nipples as he stretches him open with mouth and fingers, making him come once on his tongue and then again on his cock. This time, he doesn’t pull out when he's finished, and Keith wakes in the morning to Adam thrusting and grinding into him. He stays in Adam’s bed the entire weekend.

Monday morning he’s incredibly satisfied and also deeply ashamed of himself. He went to Adam _willingly_ , let himself be used as a warm body and a wet hole, and he’s not sure the hormones were one-hundred percent to blame. He tries to tell himself it was a bad idea but all the can hear is Adam’s voice in his head, praising him and telling him ‘ _what a good little Omega bitch, splitting yourself open for me’_. The shame only intensifies by Wednesday, accompanied by a healthy helping of guilt as Iverson and Sanda broadcast the first official video from the _Persephone_ ’s successful landing on Kerberos.

It’s the first word they’ve received from the crew outside of typed communications, and seeing Shiro’s wide smile and hearing his voice - making his report and trading conversation with the Holts - makes Keith sick to his stomach. He leaves the commissary before the message has even ended, sprinting to the bathroom to puke up his meager lunch. He rinses his mouth in the sink and catches sight of himself in the mirror. His reflection makes him wince.

“This’ll all be over soon,” he promises quietly, a hand resting on his stomach. He doesn’t realize how wrong he is.

Friday evening, he makes his way to the garage while Adam is in class and takes out Shiro’s bike, prepared to ride all of the way to New Mexico and get settled in at the shelter the doctor had told him about. He doesn’t even get past the gate.

“Sorry, cadet,” the gate officer tells him, “looks like your weekend pass was revoked.”

Keith’s blood runs cold. He can feel his fingers going a little numb.

“By who?” he asks. He already knows.

“Looks like...Instructor Ward.”

The blood is rushing in Keith’s ears. He thanks the gate officer almost mechanically, returning Shiro’s bike to the garage and making his way back to his room on autopilot. Adam’s not waiting for him this time. Keith drops his bag, hands shaking. He squeezes his eyes shut and lets out a frustrated scream, dropping to his knees and curling in on himself, arms around his stomach as he cries. For himself ( _for his baby_ ). Eventually, he picks himself up and curls up in his bed instead of on the floor. He doesn’t know how long he's lying there before Adam finally makes his appearance.

“You revoked my weekend pass,” Keith states dully.

“I did,” Adam confirms. “I thought there might be something you needed to tell me.” His voice is deceptively calm as he comes to stand by Keith’s bed. Keith finds himself staring at Adam’s knees and he forces himself to sit upright and look at his face. Adam’s posture is loose and dangerous, hands hidden behind his back. Keith clenches his jaw.

“No.”

“No?” Adam repeats. Keith glares up at him defiantly.

“I don’t think I need to tell you something you already know.”

Adam smiles grotesquely as he draws one hand from behind his back, holding up a square photograph in black and white. Keith’s eyes shut and he bites his lip. He doesn’t know why he kept the photo, but some…instinct wouldn’t let him throw it out.

“You went through my things.”

“Good thing I did, too,” Adam responds idly, “else you might be making a huge mistake right now.”

“A mistake?” Keith laughs bitterly. “Keeping it would be a mistake!” It’s the wrong thing to say, and he knows it the instant the words leave his mouth, burning his tongue.

Adam snarls, whipping his other hand out from behind his back to haul Keith up by his collar with both hands, turning and pinning him against the wall.

“That’s not your decision!” he growls, pressing the ultrasound against Keith’s cheek. “That’s my child! _My_ pup! You don’t get to decide to kill it on a whim!”

“You think it was easy?!” Keith gasps. “You...you said we have to stay secret! You said it was the only way!” he's crying again now, one cheek pressed against the wall in a vain attempt to escape Adam’s anger. “How are we supposed to stay a secret if I’m walking around pregnant! O-or w-with a child that looks like you!”

The room falls deathly silent. Adam’s grip on Keith’s collar releases, and Keith didn’t even realize his feet had left the floor until he's being gently lowered back onto them. Adam caresses his face, wiping away his tears.

“You thought you were protecting me,” he whispers, shocked. Keith nods hurriedly.

“Wh-what Omega w- _wants_ to get rid of a baby? It goes against every instinct we have, right?” Keith insists, drawing on Adam’s beliefs. A smile graces Adam’s lips, almost soft - almost _sincere_ , even - and Keith sniffles, a few more tears making tracks down his cheeks. “I just...I didn’t know what else to do,” he admits honestly. Adam leans forward, pressing their foreheads together.

“It’s okay, baby,” he croons, hands cupping Keith’s face “it’s all going to be be okay.”

“Wh-what about the Garrison?” Keith asks, bringing up his own hands to wrap around Adam’s wrists.

“I’ll take care of you,” he insists, the hand still holding the ultrasound falling away from Keith’s face to press against his stomach almost reverently. “I’ll take care of _both_ of you.”

He says it so sincerely, so intensely, that Keith _believes_ him. Believes in the love and sweetness Adam starts whispering in his ear...or he wants to, anyway. He sniffs again, wiping at his eyes. He wraps shaking arms around Adam’s back and thinks that maybe - just maybe - together they can do this. He can have Adam’s baby and make him happy and make him _proud_ and together, they’ll be the family Keith’s always wanted but had given up hope on finding.

Maybe.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What are we going to do?” Keith breathes.
> 
> “About?”
> 
> “About the Garrison.”
> 
> “What _about_ the Garrison?” Adam sighs.
> 
> “I’m not going to be able to hide this forever,” Keith points out, his exasperation and fear leaking into his voice, “My uniform is already getting tight and I highly doubt the Garrison is going to want to keep a pregnant Omega student. They’ll come up with some kind of excuse to expel me.”
> 
> “Would that be a bad thing? You’ll need to raise the baby, after all. Can’t do that flying missions to Mars,” Adam remarks, tone almost teasing.
> 
> “I,” Keith hesitates, curling a fist in his sheets, “I want to graduate,” he whispers.
> 
> “What’s the point?” Adam laughs.
> 
> “It’s the only thing I’ve ever been good at.”
> 
> “Mmm, I don’t know,” Adam counters, fingers spreading Keith open, “you’re pretty good at this,” he says into his ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note that I am playing real fast and loose with A/B/O biology in this verse bc I’m still figuring out how much detail I wanna get into with the biology. But for posterity’s sake, let’s say Male Omegas have a penis (albeit smaller than the average male Alpha or Beta) AND a vagina and leave it at that, okay?
> 
> Also I chose a semi-random year for Keith's birth bc OG VLD is set in an undetermined year in the future and I'm declaring it to be approx. 2050 or somewhere thereabouts. :)

Keith’s leg is shaking. He’s aware of it, but he can’t seem to make it stop. At least, not until Adam reaches out to curve a hand around his leg, just above his knee, and _squeezes,_ giving him a sharp look. Keith glances at him and swallows.

“Sorry,” he whispers. He starts picking at his cuticles instead.

Yesterday, Keith had been planning on having an abortion. Today, he finds himself with Adam in a doctor’s office an hour away from the New Mexico border where there’s no chance of anybody recognizing either one of them. He doesn’t know how Adam got the appointment on such short notice, but he also doesn’t know for sure just how long Adam’s known about the baby. It’s been about fifteen minutes since the nurse came in to take Keith’s weight and vitals, and they’re waiting another twenty before the door opens and the nurse finally comes back in with a doctor. Adam’s hand slides discreetly off of Keith’s leg.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” she greets, closing the door behind them. “Keith...Kogane, right?”

“Uh, that’s me,” Keith answers, clearing his throat. He stops picking at his nails in favor of clutching at the edge of the exam table instead.

“Hi, Keith. I’m Dr. Pickering,” she introduces, flipping through Keith’s chart and paperwork before glancing up at them. “And who is this?”

“Adam,” the older man answers, “Keith’s appointment is with Dr. Hendricks.”

“Dr. Hendricks got called to the hospital for an emergency C-section, I’m covering his patients” Dr. Pickering explains, “can you confirm your birthday for me please, Keith?”

“October 25th,” he answers.

“Of what year?”

“2033,” he answers a little quieter. Dr. Pickering visibly pauses, exchanging a glance with the nurse.

“Have you ever had a pelvic exam before, Keith?”

“Uh, no,” he clears his throat. “No, I haven’t.”

“In that case, I’d like to do one today.”

“Is that necessary?” Adam asks. Keith hunches his shoulders as the doctor locks eyes with Adam.

“For a male Omega in his first pregnancy, who's never had one before? Yes. It is,” she answers coolly. “Not just for his own health, but also to check for any abnormalities or issues that could complicate the pregnancy and the birth. So, unless you’re a parent or guardian or the _father_ , then I’m going to ask you to step out into the waiting room so we can complete Keith’s exam.”

Adam holds the doctor’s gaze unflinchingly.

“He can stay,” Keith tries, “I don’t -”

“It’s alright, Keith,” Adam interrupts, standing from his chair and squeezing Keith’s shoulder, “I’ll be right outside, and I’ll be back for the ultrasound.” Keith swallows but nods and Adam steps out of the room. Once he’s gone, the nurse passes Keith a paper gown and directs him to the curtained-off corner of the room so he can change. He does so quickly and clambers awkwardly back onto the exam bed. Dr. Pickering gives him an encouraging smile as she pulls on a pair of gloves and the nurse finishes setting up an instrument tray.

“It’s okay to be nervous,” she soothes, helping him arrange his legs in the stirrups. “Especially during your first exam.”

“I still get a little anxiety everytime I go in for a pelvic,” Jane tells him conspiratorially. He gives her a quick smile and wiggles against the table until he’s as comfortable as he’s going to get.

“Ready?”

Keith nods and a moment later jumps at the feeling of unfamiliar fingers poking at him.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Totally normal,” she assures him, reaching for an instrument on the tray. “This is gonna be a little cold, so apologies in advance. You’re gonna feel a pinch and a stretch, okay?”

Keith nods and then winces at the sensation of cold plastic against sensitive skin. He grits his teeth when he feels the promised pinch and breathes out harshly through his nose.

“I’m just gonna take a look and get a swab or two. I’ll be as quick as I can, I promise.”

Keith nods.

“Jane said you had an ultrasound already? At a free clinic?”

“T-two week’s ago. Just to confirm the pregnancy,” he confirms.

“Did they say how far along you looked?”

“Thirteen weeks. What are you looking for?” He finally asks as the nurse caps the long swabs.

“More like what are we not looking for, really,” she explains, “checking to make sure there are no infections or things that could cause complications.”

“Another pinch,” the doctor warns before removing the speculum, “and we’re finished. Would you like to get dressed before we do the ultrasound?”

“Please.”

“Did they give you any prenatal vitamins at the clinic, Keith?” She asks as she helps him lower his legs and sit back up.

“N-no. Just the ultrasound.”

“Did they tell you that you should be taking prenatal vitamins?”

Keith shakes his head.

“I...I wasn’t sure I was going to keep it,” he admits quietly.

“What made you change your mind?”

He shrugs, getting down off of the table and heading back behind the curtain to change.

“It’s very brave, you know,” the doctor says mildly, “for a male Omega, especially one so young, to be doing this on their own.”

“I’m not on my own. Adam’s helping me out.”

“Adam,” she repeats carefully, “how long have you known Adam?”

“Uh, a couple of years? Maybe three or four.”

“Did Adam give you those bruises?”

Keith freezes, pants halfway up his legs. He takes a shaky breath and finishes pulling them up, fingers fumbling with his zipper.

“What bruises?” He tries, hoping he doesn’t smell as anxious and worried as he feels. They can’t know. If they know, then they’ll take Adam away and Adam...Adam’s all he’s got, now. Adam doesn’t care that he’s fucked up and twisted and ruined. Adam _loves_ him.

“The bruises on your legs,” she answers. “Did Adam do that to you?”

“No.”

“Keith, if someone is hurting you, we can -”

“No one is hurting me!” Keith insists more harshly, pulling back the curtain to face both doctor and nurse. “ _Especially_ not Adam!”

“Keith, if you’re scared of him, we can help,” Dr. Pickering insists kindly.

“Adam _already_ helped me,” he insists, hands curled into fists at his sides to try and stop them from shaking, hoping they can’t hear his heart beating frantically in his chest. “I-I got mixed up with the wrong kind of Alpha and got knocked up and Adam offered to help. Make sure I got to doctor’s appointments and wouldn’t miss school, and-and all of that!”

"Okay, sweetie, it’s okay,” Jane soothes, reaching out and gently leading him back over to the exam bed, helping him back up onto it. “We just want to make sure you’re safe, that’s all. You, and your baby.”

“We’re fine,” Keith chokes out, taking a deep breath. “Can you just bring Adam back in and do the ultrasound? Please?”

She nods and lets him go, collecting the samples and exiting the room. A couple of minutes pass, during which the doctor gets the ultrasound ready, before Adam steps back into the room alone. He glances between Keith and the doctor and Keith offers a shaky - hopefully reassuring - smile.

“Everything alright?” He asks, stepping over to stand next to Keith.

“Everything looks good,” the doctor answers, “we’re ready for the ultrasound.”

Keith leans back on the bed and lifts his shirt to reveal the barely-there curve of his stomach. He winces as she squeezes out some of the cold gel and then a moment later, the room is filled with the odd _swish_ of the ultrasound. After a little searching, a different noise fills the room and Keith can’t help but smile, tension easing out of him.

"The heartbeat,” he remarks quietly. Dr. Pickering smiles at him.

“That’s right,” she confirms, “looks like someone paid attention.”

“Can you tell whether it’s a boy or a girl?” Adam asks, sounding almost distracted. Keith glances over at him and is momentarily stunned; he doesn’t think he’s ever seen such a soft expression on Adam’s face before. There’s no tension in his jaw, the small almost ever-present line on his brow is gone. His mouth is relaxed, curling up at the edges in what Keith is pretty sure is the only genuine smile he’s ever seen him give.

“Uh, we could try,” the doctor responds, turning back to the ultrasound, “but it looks like they’re being a bit shy. Keith, are you positive the doctor at the clinic said thirteen weeks?”

“That’s what they said,” Keith answers, snapping his attention back to the doctor.

“Is something wrong?” Adam asks sharply, the softness of his features disappearing as quickly as it had appeared.

“The baby just looks a bit small for fifteen weeks, that’s all,” Dr. Pickering tells them, “Keith’s a bit underweight too, though…have you been having a lot of morning sickness?”

“Yea,” he admits. “Feels like every day, almost. Sometimes I get nauseous every time I eat.”

“We’ll get you started on the vitamins and that should hopefully help things along, size-wise.” She turns off the machine and wipes off Keith’s stomach. “The morning sickness and nausea should lessen and taper off soon, but I want you to keep an eye on your weight. If the morning sickness doesn’t stop or you don’t see yourself putting on a decent amount of weight, I want you to call or come in, okay?”

“Okay,” Keith agrees, sitting upright.

“Thank you, doctor,” Adam says, “Can I get him home now?”

“Sure. Leave the discharge papers with the desk and set up your visit for next month. Oh, one more thing,” she pulls a slim storage device out of the ultrasound machine and holds it out. Keith reaches out slowly, hesitantly, but finally takes the device from her with careful fingers.

With that, the doctor steps out of the room, leaving the two of them alone. Keith follows Adam out of the room and down the hall quietly. Adam doesn’t say a single word until they’re standing outside of his car in the parking garage. Keith is getting ready to get into the passenger seat when Adam pulls him around and seals his lips over Keith’s. Keith makes a small noise of protest, but melts into the contact as Adam presses a hand to the small of his back, holding him close. When he pulls back, Keith’s eyes have gone a little hazy.

“Wh-what was that for?” he asks breathlessly. Adam just settles a hand on Keith’s slight bump before opening the car door for him to climb inside. He naps fitfully the entire drive back to the Garrison.

 

-*-

Keith has never been more grateful for having his own bunk, he thinks woefully. It’s Thursday morning and he’s standing in front of the mirror in his room staring forlornly at his reflection. His uniform jacket looks snug and his pants _feel_ it. The jacket’s not a real problem yet - only noticeable if you’re really looking for it, which Adam appears to be. Every chance he’s had so far this week has found him pulling Keith into some secluded or semi-private area whenever they’re passing each other or he catches sight of Keith in a hallway. He’ll push Keith against a wall or into a supply closet or abandoned classroom and press up against him, rutting against him, one hand always, _always_ pressed against Keith’s slow-growing baby bump.

No, the real problem is his belt. Supposed cinch tight around his waist, Keith is finding he can no longer tighten it the normal amount without it accenting his disappearing waistline and pressing against his stomach in a way that would definitely be uncomfortable for the entire day. If he makes it any looser, however, it won’t sit on his waist at all. His options are to either requisition a new belt, not wear it and take the write-up, or tighten it and deal with it. He’s pretty sure that if he asked Adam, he knows what his answer would be, he thinks, sniffing and blinking back the sudden gathering of tears.

“Fucking hormones,” he growls under his breath, wiping at his eyes and then tightening the belt. He can deal with it for two days, he decides, until he has a chance to get a new one. He thinks maybe it’s only so noticeable to him because, as a whole, he’s now keenly aware of all of the changes happening to his body.

The duty officer knocks on his door and he turns around for inspection, ready to get on with the day.

Adam doesn’t manage to corner him during the day, but he shows up in Keith’s room that night. He strips down, setting his glasses on Keith’s nightstand, and slides into Keith’s bed, pulling Keith back against his chest. Both hands slide beneath Keith’s sleep shirt, one resting against his stomach and the other coming to rest just beneath his small chest, thumb resting in the small dip between his breasts. He noses at Keith’s hair and neck, scenting him; he’s been doing that increasingly more since he learned about the baby.

“I saw you in the commissary during your lunch,” he breathes against the back of Keith’s neck, “you weren’t eating.”

“Too nauseous,” Keith replies, breath hitching as Adam mouths at his scent glands, sucking almost gently.

“You need to eat. For the baby.”

Keith nods as the hand on his stomach travels lower to rub at his entrance.

“I know,” he pants, “I - ah - I’m taking the-the vitamins.”

Adam just hums into Keith’s shoulder, fingers circling at his entrance until he’s practically gushing slick.

“Adam, I wanted to ta -anh,” Keith gasps, falling silent as Adam works him open slowly, gentle in a way he’s never really been with him. He spreads him open, twisting and curling his fingers until he’s three-deep inside of him. Keith clutches at the wrist of the hand still pressed against his chest as Adam withdraws his fingers in favor of lining up his cock and pressing in slowly, almost torturously. Keith moans as he bottoms out, head thrown back, giving Adam plenty of room to work at his neck. Adam pulls Keith’s leg up and back over his hip as he thrusts slow and deep, angling for the spot that has Keith’s eyes rolling back in his head, has him letting out small, punched-out breaths every time Adam slides home. It’s intense in a way Keith has never felt before, and as good as it feels, it also feels somehow _wrong_ that’s its coming from Adam.

‘ _It feels like making love_ ,’ Keith realizes, a hand coming up to grip at Adam’s hair as he quickens his pace a bit and sinks teeth into Keith’s neck, stopping just before he breaks the skin. Keith lets out a sound somewhere between a moan and a whine and comes untouched, body milking Adam to his own orgasm. He’s still twitching as Adam slips out and lowers Keith’s leg. For once, he doesn’t reach for his camera, just slides his fingers through the mess he’s left behind, _tut_ -ing at Keith when he tries to twitch away, oversensitive.

“What are we going to do?” Keith breathes once his chest has stopped heaving.

“About?”

“About the Garrison.”

“What _about_ the Garrison?” Adam sighs.

“I’m not going to be able to hide this forever,” Keith points out, his exasperation and fear leaking into his voice, “My uniform is already getting tight -”

“Mmm, I noticed.”

“-and I highly doubt the Garrison is going to want to keep a pregnant Omega student. They’ll come up with some kind of excuse to expel me.”

“Would that be a bad thing? You’ll need to raise the baby, after all. Can’t do that flying missions to Mars,” Adam remarks, tone almost teasing.

“I,” Keith hesitates, curling a fist in his sheets, “I want to graduate,” he whispers.

“What’s the point?” Adam laughs.

“It’s the only thing I’ve ever been good at.”

“Mmm, I don’t know,” Adam counters, fingers spreading Keith open once more, “you’re pretty good at this,” he says into his ear.

“I - hah! Shiro,” Keith manages to whine. Adam freezes, body coiling with tension, two fingers still curled inside of Keith.

“Takashi? Still hung up on that fruitless fantasy?” He spits.

“No,” Keith pants, “no, I - he did so much to get me into the Garrison. He vouched for me, in spite of me being an Omega and all the trouble I got into. I feel like…like I owe it to him. I just…don’t want him to be disappointed in me when he gets back.”

“Disappointed in you?” Adam repeats, twisting his fingers almost cruelly as he pulls them out. Keith bites his lip to keep from shouting. Adam removes his arm from around Keith’s chest and pushes at him until he’s lying on his front, Adam’s full weight pressing down on him. He can feel Adam’s cock half-hard again, pressed against his ass.

“You think Takashi would be disappointed in you if you didn’t _graduate_?”

"I -”

“How disappointed do you think he’d be to see you like _this_?” Adam leans back, redistributing his weight so he can pull Keith’s legs open. “Spread open and begging for cock like the Omega bitch you are?” He pulls Keith back by his hips, spearing him open on his cock with one smooth tug, his own cum the only thing to ease the way. Keith gasps at the feeling, still sensitive. He tries to work himself up onto his elbows, but Adam presses him back down with a firm hand on his neck, holding him firmly against the bed as he fucks into him, growing fully hard again inside of him.

“Would Takashi be disappointed,” he grunts on a thrust that has Keith gasping for air, “if he learned how eager you are to be used like this? How eager you were for me to _breed_ you?” Adam leans forward, pressing his chest to Keith’s back as he sets a punishing pace, fucking into him, hand tight on the back of his neck, squeezing tighter the closer he gets until he finds his release once more, adding to what he’s already left inside of Keith.

“Don’t you think he’d be more disappointed in you if he were to learn that, in order to pursue some fantastical pipe dream, you essentially abandoned your own child?” He snarls in Keith’s ear before he pulls out and climbs out of the bed, leaving Keith to collapse onto his side and curl in on himself as Adam pulls his clothes back on. Keith gulps for air, tries to control his breathing as his mind whirls. Adam’s right: no matter what he does, Shiro will hate him either way.

“I d-don't know what I’ll do,” he manages to chokes out as Adam reaches for the palm reader to open the door. The older man pauses.

“Do?”

“W-without the Garrison. I-I’ve g-got nowhere else t-to go.”

Adam drops his hand and steps back towards the bed. He curls a hand in Keith’s hair and slowly pulls him up to a sitting position, tilting his head up to face him. He uses the thumb of his free hand to wipe the twin tear tracks on either cheek, licking the salty taste from his finger before pressing a harsh kiss to the side of Keith’s head.

“Don’t you worry about it,” he murmurs into his hair before releasing his hold and leaving the room, the picture of composure. Keith slumps over, curling around his pillow to muffle his sobs. He just hopes his hair will hide the bruises he can feel forming on his neck.

 

-*-

 

The entire Garrison finds out on a Wednesday.

After more than a week on the prenatal vitamins, Keith has been able to gain a little more weight. He’s managed to weigh himself in the PT gym at the end of almost every day - when the gym is almost empty - and has been keeping track in a small notebook he had found abandoned in his desk. The nausea is still there, but he hasn’t thrown up for a week, so he’ll take it. He manages to requisition a uniform one size larger without raising any eyebrows. Everything seems to be looking up.

Until Wednesday.

It’s the week of exams and although he might not be feeling nauseous he has been exhausted, and by the time the Wednesday PT class rolls around his back is _aching_ like nothing else. He takes his time changing in the locker room, idly thinking that he maybe should have skipped the PT final and just hoped they didn’t fail him. He’s just grateful his PT uniform is a looser fit than the Garrison-issued orange.

A normal PT class is a mix of obstacle courses, self-defense, basic marksmanship and munitions, martial arts, and anything else the Garrison deems necessary to the physical fitness and well-being of its cadets and future-officers. The end of year finals are never the same exercises twice; his first year as a cadet, the final had been a written examination. His second, it had been endurance training. His third, an obstacle course that they had been forced to run for hours until they satisfied the time the Sergeant was looking for. Last year, Keith’s class had been split into two teams and forced to run a hostile enemy drill. This year, Keith has no idea what to expect, but he hopes it’s something he can pass quick and easy and then go crawl into bed. He should’ve known that he’d never get that lucky.

They’ve been focused on self-defense and close-quarters combat over the past few months, so he feels like he should have been expecting it when the Sergeant announces that they’ll be doing partnered spars for their final exam. Keith mentally groans, leaning his head against the wall where he’s hiding in the back of the group of cadets. He’s the only Omega in his class, which puts him at a size disadvantage, and however scrappy he may be, he’s currently sore and tired and _not_ up to this. His only hope now is that he gets assigned one of the smaller Betas; no such luck.

The Sergeant barks out his last name, and - when he raises his hand and lets out an irritated grunt from where he’s leaning against the wall - announces that he’s been partnered with James Griffin. Keith pinches the bridge of his nose with one hand and rubs at the small of his back with the other. Keith briefly considers just walking out, but his class is the last group in the PT gym for the night, and as the rising seniors, they’ve garnered quite the audience from some of the higher-ups looking for who they’re going to play favorites with next year. His match with Griffin isn’t for a little while, so he slides down onto the floor and starts slowly stretching out his legs.

Halfway through the matches, he catches sight of Adam sidling into the room, a pinched, unhappy expression on his face. He locks eyes with Keith and his frown seems to deepen. Keith hunches his shoulders, suddenly filled with the dread that he’s done something wrong. He doesn’t have time to dwell on it, however, because the Sergeant is calling him and Griffin to the mat.

“I want a clean spar,” he barks as they each take their positions. “Nothing below the belt.” With that, he steps off of the mat and takes his place on the sidelines.

Several beats of silence pass before Griffin finally gets impatient and makes the first move, lunging forward to aim a punch at Keith’s head. Keith dodges. He lets Griffin take the offense, bobbing and weaving with his own defense and avoiding what he can and blocking what he can’t. It makes for a boring fight, he’s sure, but he thinks absently that Shiro would be a little proud of him for not just rushing right in and swinging. His mind stutters a little at the thought, spiralling into other thoughts of Shiro’s inevitable disappointment in him and probable anger. Griffin takes advantage of his distraction to clip Keith in the shoulder, and Keith barely reacts quick enough to grab Griffin’s wrist and twist his entire arm back behind his body in an uncomfortable position. He keeps twisting, increasing the pressure until Griffin is on his knees with his free hand curled into a fist against the mat, face a grimace of pain. The sudden movement makes Keith a little dizzy, but he keeps his hold and the pressure, waiting for Griffin to tap out.

He doesn’t.

Griffin manages to shift his weight and balance and kicks backwards with one leg. He catches Keith in the shin, sending him toppling forward and forcing him to release Griffin’s arm or risk breaking it. He manages to control his tumble over Griffin and comes back up on his knees, twisting around just in time for Griffin to charge at him, knocking him to the floor. They grapple for a minute or two before Keith manages to pull the other boy into an armbar. Griffin is spitting mad and Keith is breathing harshly from the effort; he can feel the sweat dripping down his neck and his back is on _fire_ , but he doesn’t let go.

He regrets it two minutes later when Griffin manages to squirm his opposite arm out from under Keith’s leg and reach over to jab at a pressure point in his arm. He shouts, his grip slackening just enough for Griffin to free himself. He guesses the move Griffin’s about to make two seconds before he does it, but can do nothing to stop him as the other boy drives his elbow straight down into Keith’s stomach.

Keith _howls_.

He jerks away, kicking at Griffin, can feel the heel of one foot connect with something as tears gather in his eyes and he curls in on himself protectively. Head down, arms around his stomach as he gasps for breath, he's never felt so winded in his life. It feels like both an instant and an eternity before there’s the touch of a familiar hand on his shoulder and the sharp, dangerous scent of an Alpha’s roiling anger filling the room.

“Lieutenant Ward, we’re in the middle of an exercise!” the Sergeant barks. Adam ignores him as he tries to get Keith to unroll, to open up, to let him _see_. Keith lifts his head just enough to meet his eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“It _hurts_ ,” he gasps. Adam wastes no time hauling Keith into his arms and barking for someone to call ahead to the medbay. Keith briefly registers Griffin complaining about a broken nose as he buries his own nose in the front of Adam’s uniform and wraps his arms a little tighter around his stomach.

 _‘It’s okay_ ,’ he tries to tell himself, ‘ _it’s going to be okay_.’

He doesn’t really pay attention as Adam practically runs through the halls towards the medbay, basks in the scent of a protective Alpha (‘ _my Alpha,’_ he thinks hazily, ‘ _protecting me’_ ). Adam shoves the doors open with his shoulder and carries Keith past the admit desk. He ignores the shouts of the clerk, striding straight to the first exam bed he sees and setting Keith down as the base doctor comes over to them.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing, Lieutenant?”

“He took an elbow to the stomach,” Adam snaps back. Keith whimpers under the sickening scent of two posturing Alphas.

“He’s a healthy seventeen-year-old boy,” the doctor snaps, “he’s just a little winded, let him walk it off!”

“He’s a pregnant Omega who just took a hard blow to his stomach,” Adam snarls, “or did you not pay attention in your scenting and pheromone classes?” Keith peeks up from beneath his bangs just enough to register the look of shock on the doctor’s face as he takes in Adam’s words and then scents the air, leaning a bit closer to Keith. A moment later he’s calling for a nurse and an ultrasound. Adam takes a step back, standing near Keith’s head but unwilling to move any further as the nurse gently pries Keith’s arms from his stomach so the doctor can feel it and pour the gel on.

“Kogane, right?” the doctor’s voice is much softer with him than it had been with Adam, but all Keith can manage is a nod. He can barely breathe as the doctor searches around with the ultrasound wand. “Are you bleeding?”

Keith shakes his head no. Other than the sweat plastering his shirt to his back, he doesn’t feel wet anywhere else.

“That’s a good sign. How far along are you?”

Keith knows that’s a question that requires a verbal answer, but he can’t seem to form words, can’t seem to form anything more than a choked off sob as the doctor finally seems to find what he’s looking for. The Beta nurse physically recoils from the smell of an Omega in distress, but the doctor hits a button on the ultrasound machine and the by-now-familiar sound of the baby’s heartbeat fills the room.

Keith lets out a relieved sob, melting back onto the bed.

“There she is,” the doctor sighs.

“She?” Keith finally manages to croak out, lifting his head to look at the ultrasound.

“Yea,” the doctor replies with a tentative smile, “she.”

Keith can’t help the tears that follow. The doctor removes the wand and wipes Keith’s stomach gently with a towel.

“I’m going to keep you overnight,” he decides, “put you on a monitor, make sure no bleeding happens and that the placenta stays intact.”

Keith nods, sniffling and wiping at his eyes as he lies back against the pillow on the small medical cot. He waits until the doctor and the nurse leave before tentatively reaching above him, searching for Adam’s hand. Adam grips his fingers tightly, breathing harshly as he tries to reign in his anger and his panic, to not give himself away.

“You’re done,” he whispers finally.

“What?”

“Here. At the Garrison.”

“Adam -” Keith’s voice breaks as Adam pulls his hand away and takes a step back.

“I will not let you risk her life for some stupid fantasy,” he hisses quietly. “If they want to kick you out, I’m not going to try and talk them out of it.”

All Keith can do is watch as Adam strides out of the room. He stares at the door for a long moment before he tilts his head back to stare at the ceiling instead. Eventually, the nurse comes back in to hook him up to an IV and some monitoring equipment. She gets him a blanket and an extra pillow and helps him get comfortable, but Keith doesn’t get much sleep that night. He’s too busy wondering if he hasn’t just ruined every potential good thing in his life.

Adam doesn’t come back in the morning. Instead, he gets a visit from Commander Iverson. He attempts to sit up straight in the bed, but Iverson waves him down, pulling over a chair.

“I think we need to have a talk about your future, cadet.”

Keith wonders if maybe this isn’t for the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> refractory period? what's that?
> 
> First of all, eternal thanks and love and smooches to my girlfriend, who has the patience of a saint and is willing to beta-read everything I write and yell at my brain when it calls it all TRASH. ILOVEYOUTHANKSFORNOTMURDERINGMEWHENICHAINTEXTYOUFREAKINGOUTATTWOINTHEMORNING!!
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who read and left kudos and comments on the first chapter! I was so nervous about posting it, I almost DIDN'T do so, so thank you to all of you wonderful readers! Y'all are the real MVPs!
> 
> And super special thanks to theodora_honey (again and always I owe you my first born or something forreal) for letting me borrow her 'verse and characterizations and play with her ideas AND for leaving such kind words on the first chapter; I was happy crying and practically wriggling with excitement so hard last night and this morning when I got your comments. You made my WEEK.
> 
> I started writing this chapter almost as soon as I finished posting the other one, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to post it as a second chapter or as a separate fic, but I felt it fit better as a direct follow-up.
> 
> I do have more planned, but no promises as to how fast it'll get written or posted (despite the fact that my ADHD brain has apparently decided to make this AU it's new obsession lolol) HOWEVER, anything posted after this will (I'm 99% sure) be posted as a separate fic or oneshot, so I did create a series for it if you wanna subscribe to that to get updates.
> 
> Thanks so much, again, for reading everybody!

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written dark!fic in...a really long time. Not since my first ever posted work way back when on FF.net. So I hope that I handled this well (or as well as such topics can be handled) and I hope I did theodora's wonderful interpretation of dark!Adam justice.
> 
> (Also I know I played fast and loose with abortion law a little bit, but I was trying to take into consideration the fact that in most ABO 'verse fics babies are treasured bc either (a) omega's are v rare, (b) it's hard for any gender other than omega to conceive, or (c) both (a) and (b) are true.)
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated. My DM's are open on twitter and tumblr if you wanna come yell or cry at me about VLD (or any other fandoms I've written for/talked about).
> 
> I do have more ideas for this based on discussions on theodoramyhoney's curiouscat. I have two possible ways that this can go and tbqh I will probably write both of them. However, I have several other WIPs that I have been neglecting so I make no promises as to when I may post anything else in this 'verse.
> 
> (ALSO before you come a'yellin, I am super pro-choice. idc if you have a baby and keep it or give it up, or decide to have an abortion. That's your business and your business only and as long as it's your choice and it's one you're comfy with, I support you)


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